The Night Police Locker Room; Episode 1: Merriment and Mirth

Updated: Mar 6, 2020

Conversations of a personal nature!

Police locker room with gear

The locker room in any police department holds many secrets and even a few dreams. In it you'll come across the ordinary and occasionally mundane, funny, annoying and even seriously dramatic fragments of cop-life. And, you can count on bitches, and moans, 'cuz that's what we do. Not everything can be shared in the Locker Room, but an awful lot is.

This is the spot we've decided to devote to the pursuits we enjoy, the things that make us tick. Be it barbeque and all things smoke, fishing in the salt and sweet water or perhaps a missive on gunsmithing or reloading ammo. We'll likely touch on hunting, eating/drinking/laughing, camping, travel, and tying flies. Lucille and Molly Yoder, cigars, bars, cabins in the woods and writing lairs are favorite subjects of ours. Rod building, maps, and globes and of course, cooking and recipes will be discussed. Examples of our peculiar brand of humor, books, authors and perhaps our inspiration will make it into the episodes of The Night Police Locker Room.

Today, the subject is Mirthfulness.

Warning: Politically Incorrect Area

The Night Police are staunch anti-politcally correctites (APC's)! You'll note this throughout our work.

Gary Larson Cartoon

Gary Larson, a long-time fave, routinely causes java spewage! What a funny man and in this 'real crime' themed cartoon he speaks to the risks of ballroom dancing. Paul and I have since given up the George Carlin inspired, cross-country, high-speed, competition ballroom dancing.

picture of Ron White, the comic

Ron White is our 'go to' for a historical perspective on law enforcement matters. Experience coupled with his well-chronicled, ruminative nuance provides a calming voice amidst the chaos.

Daffy Duck cartoon

"Can be blown away by shotgun at close range without dying."

Daffy Duck, Philosopher & Raconteur

Robin Willams dressed as a cheerleader

Robin Williams, comic genius and undeniably a darling cheerleader!

Picture of Keith Richards of the Rolling Stones

I’ve never had a problem with drugs…I’ve had problems with the police.

Keith Richards, Rolling Stones

picture of Bonnie McFarlane, Canadian-American comic

I don’t think cops should wear mirrored sunglasses; the

whole time the guy was chewing me out, all I could think

was “I should cut my bangs.”

Bonnie McFarlane, Canadian-American comic

This happens to be a great friend of ours who's an actual Viking! We call him Steven the Red. He's a storyteller extraordinaire and this is one of our faves!

Often times its good slap-stick comedy in a movie that sets us off. Some of it only works once or twice, but other schticks get us every time we watch. Most of the vintage National Lampoon movies are ripe with visual and verbal humor that we love. Here we give you a favorite scene from Christmas Vacation

Most things done by Eddie Murphy work for us. His December 2019 reappearance on SNL and a visit to Mr. Robinson’s Neighborhood makes our point.

Picture of Mark Twain in a white suit

Mark Twain on writing

  • A successful book is not made of what is in it, but of what is left out of it.

  • My books are water; those of the great geniuses are wine — everybody drinks water.

  • Substitute ‘damn’ every time you’re inclined to write ‘very’; your editor will delete it and the writing will be just as it should be.

  • I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.

  • Classic: A book which people praise and don’t read.

Bars are another theme in our writing. The Night Police have been known to frequent a licensed premise every now and again. Ron White is very Night Police and we thought it appropriate to share with y'all.